The Right to Give Up [TRIGGER WARNING]

This year I have thought a lot about suicide. How it could help me get rid of these horrible thoughts going on in my head. How it could help me stop these feelings. I keep thinking to myself, why should I not be allowed to give up on myself if other people can?

I have had so many people give up on me this year, too many, and it hurts so much. I’m trying so hard to get better and improve my well being and people don’t stick around long enough to see it. They are left with the impression that I am a failure and there is nothing I can do about it.

It’s socially unacceptable and even illegal to commit suicide, yet I find myself pro suicide if it is wanted. Life is so difficult and honestly why should anyone have to deal with it if they don’t want to? I don’t see it as the coward’s way out but rather a way to escape the horrible events, feelings, and thoughts of life. Yes it will hurt the people they love, but at a certain point it comes down to you, and what you want for yourself. Am I saying I want to commit suicide? No, but I do think it is an option for anyone feeling like life is just too difficult.

If people have the right to give up on you, you should have the right to give up on yourself. I’m sorry this post isn’t like my other posts. Usually I try to provide advice on how to combat these types of feelings, but I have come a long way to- You know what? I’m not sorry for feeling this way. Death should be a choice, no one should be forced to live a horrible life if it truly is horrible.

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